Recognizing Emotional/Physical Balance in Riding or My Lesson Learned at Muckleratz 50 Race, By Caroline North

After a long month of June of haying, teaching, training, and doing all things horse, I wanted to just go out and ride. The kind of ride that gets you out in unfamiliar woods and trails that you can just be…

So, Glory, my Quarab gelding, and I traveled down to PA for our last endurance race before the busyness of summer kicked into high gear. We were both fit and prepped well enough, and this was an easier 50-mile race to compete in, so I was pretty confident in our abilities and in doing the physical fitness math.

The evening before the race started, Glory and I went for our usual pre-ride walk and stretch around the ride camp. All was well. Then I felt a gentle bump on the back of my arm, Glory was checking in with me and nuzzled me respectfully as is his habit if he needs my attention. But this time I felt and heard his question so clearly ‘Are you okay for this?’  I of course replied immediately back to him, ‘Yes! I’m fine. Thank you for checking.’ 

But in reality, I wasn’t fine. As I walked him around and I pondered his outreach (this kind of dialogue is something I have encouraged him to participate with me fully via respectful body language since he was born on the farm) that was such a clear checking in with me, I started to realize just how tired I was. You can’t hide this kind of bodily and emotional tiredness from your horse partner when you are joined in an adventure.

Digging a little deeper I realized this emotional exhaustion was more prevalent than bodily tiredness. Exhaustion that still lingered from a disappointing pulled shoe (that was just bad luck) that cost us our National Championship Ride earlier in June. Emotional weariness that comes from supporting others in their own learning with their horses, even though it’s my calling. Emotional weariness from trying to do everything well, from keeping the garden to making healthy meals (note meals were the first thing to go downhill). A pressure cooker of my own design.

Glory felt I wasn’t at 100 percent emotional fitness. He was a little worried about me. So, I adjusted, adapted, and decided to just let this race play out however it may, even if it meant we have to stop halfway. I let go of the outcome.

We walked back to the trailer, and he seemed quite relieved. The morning of the race, it was an easy start at 6 am. Both of us are seasoned enough endurance competitors that we can just chill out on the first loop. As I was riding him though, his behavior was way different then I was used to.  He was hanging back, drifting behind my sister’s horse Merri, when he normally leads in front.

He was ‘babysitting’ ME. He took matters into his own hooves. He knows how to babysit riders, he is a wonderful lesson horse at home, but has never ‘babysat’ ME quite like this before, it’s always the other way around, I’m supposed take care of him at these races! I was at first a little offended. Then I stuck to my plan and just rolled with it. I really let him in and carry me on a soul level. As we went through the loops and miles, my emotional tiredness gradually subsided as my physical tiredness grew.

 The woods and trails did their magic, and even though it was hot, and Glory and I both started to whine to each other, I felt myself getting lighter inside. I made some firm resolutions to do more self-care at home. He was kind of demanding it, like a good partner. But it is up to me to do the work. I can’t just ride my problems away, that’s not fair to the horse.

We finished the race pretty strong at 3:00 pm, we even placed ninth even though we weren’t trying too hard. We had a wonderful, shared experience, which is what the sport of endurance riding is all about. Glory helped me get my head out of a stuck place. He reminded me that my internal balance must come first for optimal partnership while riding. I encourage all my horses to this level of awareness.

I hope all of you do as well, your horse will hold you accountable either way. Ride in balance and joy!

Caroline North